Great News for the Chinese New Year!

Huahua wasn't thrilled with her early morning testing; partly because she was asking for crackers on the way to the hospital and she had woke up way to early!  She enjoyed seeing the kids off on the bus and I had warned the others not to eat or drink in front of her this morning. Jackson was very thoughtful and was munching on his granola bars out in the mud room while putting on his boots.  He had been there plenty of times before to know the drill of going hungry before procedures and understood how it felt!  Amazing how God uses our own trials to teach us compassion for others down the road.

As soon as we arrived at the hospital I saw our interpreter.  It is helpful for now to have someone be able to explain to her what is happening.  She relates the hospital to experiencing pain.  As soon as we walk into a room she starts to say  "boooo oowwwies"   (no hurt).  I tried to reassure her there would be no pain today, only pictures of her tummy, but she was still very scared.  They took a series of imaging with contrast dye and watched as it flowed through her intestines.  At first the examiner reported Huahua had mal-rotation since her stomach was on the wrong side (the right side) and the beginning of the bowel was on the same side. I thought I was going to cry, but held it together since she was already a big mess.  We knew going in there was a 70-90% chance she would have this malrotation and succumbed to the idea of another surgery. The radiologist asked for her to drink some more contrast and wait another 30 minutes for the dye to push further through.  Upon further review with the second set of pictures, the radiologist reported her small intestines were not mal rotated!  I think we both said They're Not??!?!?!?!?!!!  and breathed a big sigh of relief.  She deserved a break and what a way to celebrate the new year for her!  Praise God for this good news!

This afternoon I also received something so very sweet in my email.  I love taking pictures of my babies and have albums and many scrapbooks of them.  But what about the little one who joins your family at 33 months.  Yes, we have a been blessed with many of her since she has been on the radar of those saving her life since last year and will hold those true to our heart.  But a baby picture, of your baby.  What a treasure.......

Looks like she was a happy girl as a baby too!

These came from Love Without Boundaries, the organization who stood behind her surgery.  They advocate and provide for orphans around the world through medical care, healing homes, sponserships.  If you are ever looking for somewhere to contribute, I would highly recommend them.  You can sponsor a child and make a difference in an orphan's life, like this beautiful angel whom we have been blessed to be called her parents.

Medical Update and More

 So I guess this is where they the "honeymoon is over".....Our real life with Huahua really begins. Life with a medically fragile child become reality.  Part of me felt tried to rationalize if you stay away from the doctors long enough maybe she'll never be sick.....right?  And another part of me was waiting for Huahua to adjust and feel safe with us before enduring medical testing.   Instead we jumped right in all at once and got a lot of answers.   Granted she is very bonded and I would say felt very protected during these procedures, but it was a lot for a little girl to process.   Praise God for the bonding we have already secured!  What I have learned during these rough patches is that it's hard to ask for help.  I don't like to ask for help anytime, it's like admitting defeat.  There is this odd feeling when you adopt a child with severe special needs, that you get what you have coming and it becomes even harder to ask for help.  A good friend reminded me this weekend (and with a meal) that the Christian church not only reaps the joy of this adoption but also bares the burden of the struggles we face.   This is so true and I was thankful for her words of encouragement. I was reminded of when I grow closest to the Lord is when I am the weakest.  If we are not weak and vulnerable, there is no need for a savior.  When I am humbled on my knees there is only one way to look up to the heavens for His grace and mercy.  So the bottom line--- asking for help is not defeat, it's recognizing you're human, with limits to what you can do, and that we need to rely on our community and most importantly our Savior to walk us through the valleys.

I realized the last update did not give you much for her medical status.  I think I needed time to process and digest before I reiterated it to family and friends.  Most stunning for me was her oxygen levels which we had thought were running around 94% was not accurate the week before or things just dropped.  Most likely just not an accurate reading.  Needless to say I thought she was doing a lot better heart wise due to her spunky personality.  During her hospital stay she ran around 82 for oxygen level and then at her follow up this past Wednesday she was at 78% saturation.  Normal people run at 99-100%.  The cardio doc wants no lower than 75%.  While getting my oil changed earlier that day, a friendly woman commented how lovely Huahua's purple fingernail polish was.  Yikes!  I guess we'll save on nailpolish, but seriously that struck a ouch in my Mommy heart.  I smiled and said "Thank you", so glad Huahua probably didn't understand her.

In the hospital, Ultrasound confirmed no spleen, as we suspected, so she started preventative antibiotics.  Her liver is across her entire stomach instead of on one side.  And tomorrow we go for a GI ultrasound to assess her small intestines.  Just learned while at hospital, it's fairly common in Heterotaxy Syndrome for the small intestines to have rotation abnormalities.  Praying this will not be added to her list.    I am learning more about the complexity of her conditions and apparently the Heterotaxy is the grand accompliance in which causes the multiple things to array.  Would you believe this rare condition is only found in 4 out of 1,000,000 children?  Can you believe we were blessed with her?  She truly is a gem in the rough  :)

The most humbling thing we learned while at the hospital in that her pulmonary artery (the one that carries the oxygenated blood back to the body) is no longer working.  The doctors had expected to hear at least a murmur, but nothing.  So this means a few things.....
        1..  As I learn more about how her heart was set up, even as deformed as it was/is --God made it that way to sustain her till her time of surgery.  He knew before all of us when that would be.  Some of her narrowed arteries saved her life because they prevented too much blood from flooding into the lungs where her values would not have kept up with the pressure.  It's just amazing that her heart was so defective, but yet so perfectly formed by her maker.  Today I spoke with a cardiothorasic surgeon about her case over the phone.  He said God has a plan for her life and I would agree.
        2.  When the doctor in the hospital told me the pulmonary artery was closed, I was struck that sometime in the last year our baby would have surely died had someone not intervened with the funds for her surgery.  Her little heart would have said no more.  It was so humbling for me to recognize the means we live with today.  The resources we have are incredible and we should remember to be thankful everyday. There are mothers and fathers that choose to place their children at the doorstep of a public building or hospital in hopes their little ones life will be saved, simply because that can't afford medical care.  These are sacrifices we have never faced but mirror our father in heaven, a sacrificial love for us.
       3.  The bidirectional glenn shunt that was performed in the hospital in China was done very well and her heart is functioning well, except for the aorta value, which controls the flow of the blood back to the body.  Will continue to monitor.
      4.  Her hemoglobin is too high.  I am learning, but from what I understand this is when the body thinks it's not getting enough oxygen.  They will monitor this too.

So we continue with a more testing and imaging to get ultimately the best pictures and idea when to perform the Fontan surgery.  Timing will depend on her oxygen saturations and hemoglobin levels.

This was from the hospital stay.  Thought it was so cute she was hanging out of the bed.  Reminds me of Jackson who would lay sideways in his bed at the hospital and the nurses would try to move him and he would scream!  This one has the same spunky personality.  Jackson and Huahua have become really close.  Love to snuggle....there must be some understanding between them we just can't recreate.  

Maybe we should not dress in purple???  Notice her little nails and lips.

Huahua and Dr. S. 

This is from two weeks ago.  Finally a family picture!  Taken at Justin's BB tournament.

The girls love to play dress up.

Someone learned how to use the scissors today!  Notice Bubba in the background, never to far away.  A few days ago I was reading a book to the girls before bed.  We all sit on the floor and Jordan sits in between my legs and then Huahua between her's and then Bubba tries to squeeze in there too.  So he was between Huahua's legs and she started squeezing his ears too rough.  I warned her to be gentle and when poor dog winced in pain I removed her from the book train and stood her off to the side and told her not to hurt Bubba.  She gave me to biggest glare out of the side of her face, like I can't believe you did that Mommy.  Typical two year testing me.
Her English comprehension is incredible and she will repeat almost anything spoken.  Today her favorite words were "excuse me".    She continued to fake cough and walk past to say "excuse me"

HICCUPS IN THE ROAD

As Jackson once called these a few years ago....we all have hiccups and this was one of Sihua's first hiccups with us.  Minor, and overall not life threatening as it was caught early, and good learning experience for us.  A crash course on her uniquely designed internal body, and a not so intimidating run through at the hospital for her.


We received discharge papers and will leave once she wakes from her nap.  This morning she endured through a echocardiogram, (about an hour), a full stomach ultrasound, (looking for any anomalies in her kidneys that might have eluded to this infection and looking for any remnants of a working spleen) and an EKG all without that sedation!  Well a little sedation.  It took the edge off for awhile and she was a little loopy, but then with the stomach ultrasound she liked the hand the controller back to the tech!  She did not mind the EKG because it came with little fun stickers and the tech gave her some to play with and it only took about 10 minutes.  She was a real trooper!


She is feeling tons better and is going home with a good plan in place and with reduced heart meds.  The orphanage had her a bit over medicated as far as her heart was concerned.  We will start next week getting her vaccinated for the necessary things you normally get as a baby.  She had not been vaccinated in her home country and did not become immune to basic diseases, which is why this fever/infection became so scary for a child without a spleen to fight infections.  She has been seen by a round of doctors and now is lined up for a care.  Cardio has everything they need to start working on a long term plan for her care as well.  So kind of a blessing in disguise because many doctors were able to evaluate her over the course of a few days.  Even her pediatrician came for a visit today at the hospital.  I think it's because Huahua is just so cute and loved by so many already!  God works in wonderful ways.


Which brings me to why do our kids have to be sick.....but I can see the seeds of the gospel being spread through Huahua's illness already.  I remember a time when I was too shy to speak of the good news of Christ's salvation to strangers, but now I can openly tell people the Lord led us to this specific little girl.  And maybe she is incredibly gorgeous and smart (okay I'm a little biased) for a reason; to lead others to the land far across the ocean, to her brothers and sisters in China, quietly sitting in an orphanage, crying in their beds, waiting for their families.  The doctors are just floored by her abilities and may they be led to extend their abilities on missions trips across the ocean, open their homes, spread the news about these children, these beautifully, perfectly made by God children, just waiting for their forever home.

Adjustments to our new life

Adoption teaches us so much.  It teaches us that we can love those that did not grow under our heart for months but only in our hearts.  This little person can fill our home with such joy and excitement. She has learned to trust us with such love and endurement, like the love God has for us.  No strings attached.  Adoption teaches us how life is not about what we want, it is about loving and giving to others.  In the process of giving, we receive so much in return.  Adoption teaches us about how precious life is, and to appreciate how much we have truly been given.  Christ sacrificed his life; gave his life so that we might not pay the penalty of death for our sins.  When God asks us to give a little of us to serve the orphans or widows of this world, is he really asking that much?

This little spirit is demanding, persistent and strong willed and why not, she survived in an orphanage for almost three years without a mother and father to support, defend and advocate for her.   I admire her tenacity and drive and know God gave her a personality not to be defeated.   We celebrated one month this past week of her adoption.  It feels like yesterday, but also like she has been with us forever.   Oh how she has grown to love each one of us in such a short time, even that huge furry gou!

She is such a character.  Here she is using the doll house furniture to sit on!  Notice the underwear on the outside of her PJ's.  And she has a diaper on to boot!  Gotta love her sense of humor :)

Jordan loves to dress Huahua up and they both love to see what new style they can find in my closet.  Here Jordan has her decked out in her cowgirl outfit with the boots on the wrong feet.

At our one month placement visit we realized we have taken lots of pictures of the kids, but none of everyone together.  We have to send reports back to China every so often on her process.  I find this interesting that they all the sudden become interested in her well being after she leaves the country.  This is a child that would have been left to die without heart surgery.  Aunt Katie, along Love without Boundaries, and hundreds of people from AL, advocated and raised the $12,000 needed to save her life!

My heart just sinks if I allow myself to  know this little life could have been lost, my daughter would have died, if people turned the other way and chose not to get involved.  She is full of life and has so much potential to give.  God has so much in store for her and we are humbled to be given the opportunity to be called her parents.

If you have called our house, you may have already spoken to Huahua on the phone.  She loves to talk.  If the phone rings, she assumes it is for her and needs to give the caller an ear full on how the day is going!  She has play phones and here her doll is getting the low down on the day.

We try to get outside if it's not too cold because she loves the fresh air.  She is going to love the summer!  The boys thought she should try snowboarding again, but Mom intervened and said let's stick to sledding.  They do have Jordan snowboarding this year.  I kept asking her to go inside and she would say No!  She learned that word really quickly!

Isn't it every little girl's dream to have a little sister to play with and dress up.  Jordan and her have this bound that is so sweet.  Huahua follows her around and repeats everything Jordan says!  That can be good and bad!  Huahua does not like when the kids are at school and will ask for Jordan.  When the school bus arrives home- its like a party!!!  And then Dad arrives home a little later and another party!!!  Don't get me wrong-Mom is still her number one person :)

When you strip her down and say Bath in chinese this is what you get---a crazy little person running around the house yelling "sheets aaawwww"   Which is chinese for bath.  Last night we did the bubble bath with jets and she went bananas!

So cute to see the different relationships forming with each sibling.  We talked with the kiddos to see how they were feeling about the transition and all agreed they loved having her home.

Few prayers requests.  Huahua has a chronic heart condition, prayer for us as we learn to manage her needs.  She has been to the Dr three times since being home in the last two weeks.  She will have her "normal child check" this week.  Pray for her as she has already been traumatized by all the medical care she has all ready received in the past.  Pray she will learn our medical care is more compassionate and she will have pain management/control through procedures here.  Pray for her Cardio appointment to be moved earlier than Feb 11 and that Ryan and I will have the understanding to know how to move forward with her care.

Thank you to everyone for your support through this journey.  Thank you for those who financially supported us, made meals, watched the kids and prayed for us.  She is truly a blessing to us all!  Some have asked what do we call her.  It just seems natural for now to use the name she is used to--Huahua (or Sihua).  She loves when we say her full Chinese name!  Daddy and her have a chant with it.  It is part of her and her heritage which we will always celebrate.  So we will gradually incorporate Jessica in, but to help her feel comfortable, why add something foreign?

She was wondering.... where do I start?  She finally figured it out!

Life returns to normal- A New Normal

Each day we spend with her, is it really possible to love someone more!  She continues to bring joy to our household.  Yes there are moments of chaos, we have four children.  And yes today we drove to school instead of the school bus because we could not get ready in time, but life is so joyful with this little spirit in our house.  She makes us laugh but has begun to form bonds with each of us in different ways.  I know it has been hard for some of you who want to see her and meet her but the best thing is to keep her "cocooned" with our family as much as possible until she knows who her family unit is.  Last night the sweetest bonding moment occurred between Jackson and Huahua.    Many of you know this adoption was first sparked because of our lessons learned through Jackson's leg lengthening process.  We trust God fully and he walks us through this.  But I held back the tears as Huahua pulled up her shirt and showed Jackson her scarred chest.  She spoke so fluently in Chinese about it (I so wished I knew what she said!)
Then Jackson pulled up his shorts and showed his scars on his leg.  This is huge for him.  This is his story and he guards it with a balance of embarassment and pride, but only shares with those he trusts.  Love and trust with such a unique perspective; they will only share with one another.

 It's probably too early to tell, but I think she might be interested in the medical field.  She is always giving the dog shots and IV's.  It's a good thing he is so tolerant and faithful.  Bubba maybe at some level knows he too was adopted---  He was found abandoned on the streets of Cedar Rapids, Iowa about 4 years ago and thanks to a rescue organization was saved from certain death at the pound.

She and Jordan have cleaned out the pots and pans.  When I need to cook something, we locate the cooking supplies in the living room behind the chair.  Never mind the girls do have their own kitchen upstairs.  Maybe I'll try cooking on their playset!

Grandma has been shopping for us mostly, except we needed a quick stop before a Doctor appointment- M & M's.  She loved the little carts.  No ear infection for her, but she has a continual cold since we adopted her.  The Dr said her lungs sounded okay, but she is always fighting something.  We have appointments scheduled for our regular peds doc and heart specialist soon.

She has taken a liking to the meow, meow, as she calls them.  They are quite large cats, but that does stop her from trying to pick them up!

We were able to get outside to play during the few moments of less frigid air.  She went sledding down the big hill once and then preferred to watch the other kids or just slide down on her butt.  

Huahua loves her Jordan.  She looks for her during the day and I have to remind her she is at school.  When the bus arrives home, it is sheer excitement- like Christmas! Huahua wants Jordan to dress her up and just play girlie things with her.  Here they broke out the play dough.

 Did I say this before--I forgot how much a two year old is like a tornado in your house!  Amazing enough the mess is trumped by sweetness, giggles and lots of new memories.
I said to Ryan this phase will pass too--and he reminded me then they turn into hurricanes!

Oh Well, I guess we dance in the rain then with our mess :)

We ventured out to Woodman's (big grocery store) yesterday and there are so many new concepts an adopted child from an orphanage will learn.  The idea to wait for food to cook on the stove was hard for her.  She thought once the food is in sight, we eat.  She learned "just a minute" real quickly.  She did eat her way through the grocery store though!  Yesterday, as I tried to put her in the cart she did a split with her legs.    It was the cutest thing.  We just laughed at each other!  So we filled an entire cart full and one nice lady commented we should probably leave soon because our cart was so full! (She didn't know how long it's been!)  Anyway as the cashier unpacked the cart, Huahua looked at him with a scowl, like why are you taking all our things?  Really if you did not understand what was going on, you too probably would have thought this guy was taking everything we had just picked out and throwing it at the lady standing over there and she's putting it in her bags too!

Sometimes I really wish I could explain to her in the moment what was going on, but she is so smart and is learning many words every day!  She was happy when we got home and pushed all the bags into the kitchen and all our items reappeared!

  

Gifts from 2013

Sihua holding her passport in Chongqing.

We have been home almost a week and settling in as our new family.  We celebrated our 2013 Christmas together and bringing in the new year in a not so exciting fashion, as we still were experiencing jet lag.  As I reflect on the year I am just amazed on how blessed we have been.   Of all the families...we were given this angel.  She melts my heart.   

Yesterday as I lay in bed with our youngest child I just smile as she peacefully sleeps.  How are we so blessed to have been given these four children?  I know there will be challenges ahead and  God has promised to walk us through them.  We humbly walked  into adoption of a child with severe medical needs knowing he will give us the strength to accomplish what his will is.  My heart aches when I look at her purple lips and clubbed fingers; for I am reminded what might happen.  When we accepted her as our daughter we did knowing we would do so giving her life to God's will.   I need to focus on the truths that I do know.  God is good, God is faithful, God is all knowing, God is all powerful, God is the creator, the Healer, Omnipresent, God is Love.

So we are blessed, every moment we spend as our new family, we are blessed.  We will learn to live in the moment-loving every moment as if it might be our last.  Adoption teaches you to care about others more than yourself.  That's how we are blessed.  Is that new car really important or should we be openingnour homes to an orphan?  Blessings come in our attitudes and how our hearts have been changed to see what God wants us to see.  My little girl called me "Wo Mommy" yesterday.  (which means my mommy)  That is a blessing.  She has already felt a connection to our family unit.  

As we were in China with 12 other Christian families, all meeting their new children I want to share with you how amazing it was to see the connections form over two weeks time.  We saw children break out of their shy shells and start to feel confident in their environment.  I saw a 14 year old boy who dreamed of having a forever family, as proud as could be, walk beside his earthly father, arm in arm down the sidewalk.  I saw a shy little 2 year girl, orphaned only a year ago, start to play and enjoy life with my little girl.  A little boy, with limited eye sight, smile and enjoy the love of his mother.  Children snuggled in their parents arms, sometimes scared, sometimes overwhelmed, but willing to trust us for their every need.  Adoption is an experience like none I have ever been through.  There are emotions and pains I did not know I could experience.  When you choose one child to become a member of your family, at some level you are saying no to the thousands left behind.  This hurts at the core of my being.  And then..... we saw their faces at the orphanage.  Little ones, big ones, and every size in between, awaiting their family to call their own.  If I could share something about the pictures you will see in their adoption files.  This is only a glimpse of this orphan on one specific day.  There is so much joy waiting to be found by you.  These children have a personality, and so much to give. They just need someone willing to walk out in faith and bring them home.  As  14 y/o Luke's father said to me, he is so glad they didn't turn the other cheek when they felt the Lord leading them to bring him home, along with their two year old daughter. on this trip to China.  Praise God for the faithful servants.  

Another day while in Guangzhou, we got off the elevator to find two teenagers playing with a remote control helicopter.  I immediately recognized the young 13 y/o Chinese girl.   Her features are just stunningly beautiful!  I had been praying for her to be matched with a family knowing she would soon age out of the system. What an honor to have meet her in person and her new family.  Again another family following God's will for their lives.    So do we recognize all the ways we are blessed.  I know I have said this before....But We ask for silver and God gives us Gold!

Getting better at the car seat since we travel down the to bus twice a day to get the kids.  Just make sure to have the Chinese songs ready to play and we have not needed the candy lately!  Did not care for the long wait this morning at the bus stop.  We sang Twinkle, Twinkle over and over again both in English and Chinese!

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Dad tickling them with his foot.  Even the dog is in on this picture.

Celebrating Justin's birthday at the bowling alley with a few of his friends. She fit right in and joined the table for some snacks.  Not big on the cupcakes!  Loved the climb around on the slippery bowing floor.

Finally Jordan has a dress up partner!  Here Huahua is demanding the fancy sandals from her sister.   Guess who was wearing them a few minutes later, only for a couple seconds, but her demand was heard.  Despite the language barrier, the message was clear!  She loves to dress up like any little girl and has begun to accessorize.  Notice the shoes in this picture.  She wore this an entire day--one of my healed boots and one of her slippers, but with matching turquoise shades.

Sihua has Jackson wrapped around her little finger.  Actually she has both the boys wrapped around her fingers.  They like to carry her around and they will get or give her anything she wants!  Here they were playing stickers.  Jackson asked to lay with her in bed last night.  Sweet, but they just ended up playing!  

She keeps asking to go outside.  How do you explain it's freezing outside?  I open the door and let her feel and then she does the burr, cold motion.  She is going to love living in the country with some fresh air and room to roam.