Heavy Hearts....

In the midst of this adoption process, I write with a heavy heart.  February is HEART Month.  Oh how our hearts ache.  I never thought I would be so entangled with congenital heart disease.  We rejoice for the medical miracles God has given us and ache for the grieving losses in life.  Why do some little ones win the battle and other fight so hard and lose.  Some are given second chances and others are not.   Just this week, a little one had a heart transplant in Boston. Praise!  And the other side of reality is another child had to lose their life for this child to live.  We will face that reality one day with our Huahua and I can't even stomach that thought.  Another little girl, Scarlett, had amazing cath results and can have the fontan surgery next week! A sweet little boy, Asher, was taken off the transplant list because his organs are shutting down.   We prayed for this little one to make it to full term and he did! and now he fights for his life at just 19 days old.  I just scream at the face of congenital heart disease.  You SUCK!!!   Birth "defects" suck!  But it was Jackson's short little leg (his birth defect) that led us to adoption.  We will never understand how God works!  Adoption changed our hearts in some amazing ways and I am so thankful for the path the Lord has put us on.  We have learned to love in ways we never thought possible, we take chances and love recklessly knowing we will probably be hurt.  We can do move forward with confidence because God loved us first.  But in truth I am scared at the same time for the journey that lies ahead.   We are about to fly across the world and bring into our family two more children with medical special needs.  One with severe orthopedic needs and one with a complex heart condition we don't even know the exact details.  My trust has to be in the One True Provider--- I can only fall back on the truths that we know.  God is good.  He is faithful.  Never changing.  Always loving, all knowing, always in control.  And he wants what is best for me, even if I don't understand the path he gives for me to walk.  I will never walk it alone.

Huahua taking her first walk after her open heart surgery.  So glad she had her mama to walk with her this time!

 For some reason it helps to look back and see how far we have come.  I have posted some pictures from the past few years.  Some highs and some lows. When we thought God was really far away, He truly was really close carrying us to a new journey only He could truly understand.

 What I have learned is that through our struggles, particularly the medical, our children have learned to care and love each other.  Not just our family but others with medical needs.

 Huahua home only a few weeks, learning to love this sister of hers!  Jordan falling in love with her forever sister!

               Celebrating one month home!  Tender caring for one another.  She wanted him to feed her :)

                                 True laughter a few weeks before her Fontan surgery.

                                        Sisterhood.  One of my favorite pictures ever!

                                  Celebrating 6 months home with ice cream.

                                                          Waterpark fun!!!!

 Pure Joy!














Last birthday as an orphan!  Jackson and Feng Nianjie celebrating their birthdays a world apart--Next year together forever.  Only God can create this love in Jackson's heart before he even meets his brother!

    Celebrating one year with her forever family!  Praise God for him watching over her!

These are the days in 2012 that started it all.  Jackson post op with his femur lengthening fixator.  Jordan, his little nurse and care taker.  We were thankful for the mild winter that allowed Jackson to get outside, even if it was in a wheelchair to get some fresh air!

This is a x ray from end of February 2012.  The femur is pulled apart about 2 inches (over the course of about 10-12 weeks) and then the bone is left to consolidate.  You can clearly see where the bone is pulled apart.  If you look closely you can see new bone matter is formed, just not solid yet.  Absolutely amazing!

The care and love was given both ways during this process.

                                            Jackson getting around outside--on a skateboard.

 These were the hard days of physical therapy that he worked so, so hard.  Only to be taken back with one fall, one break, six months later.  We started all over again.  But in the end This young man said God had a purpose in all of this and now we see what God was preparing our lives for.....

ONE..................

               
                                             TWO...................

.
                  THREE  Less ORPHANS in this WORLD.......        


We are  close to leaving.  Our last piece of paperwork will be on the doorstep of the Ch*nese government when they open after the new year on Monday.  Within two weeks we should get our last response (Article 5) and then travel approval.  Then we will be booking our plane tickets.  We should travel by end of March!!!!!    Please pray for these two boys hearts as they prepare to join our family.